Dating someone who is not out of the closet
This is a developmental process with various psychological factors and milestones that occur through as we try to make sense of our sexual identity.
The most popular model depicting these stages was developed by Vivienne Cass and is called the Cass Model of Sexual Orientation Identity Formation.
Perplexing dilemmas abound when you’re single in the gay dating market, and perhaps one of the most common head-scratchers is when you, as an out gay man, meet and are immediately attracted to a man whom you discover is in the closet. Should you invest your heart and energy into building a romance and potential partnership?
it is only natural for you to wish to reveal you’re your friends and family that you have found someone to love and to really begin sharing your life with your partner.
Family and religious pressures may be too intense on some individuals to make their coming out a smooth process.
Even if family and culture are not an issue, negative reactions from others in the early coming out process can turn someone off from further sharing their sexual orientation.
A free and open relationship would add so much more depth and meaning to your love; however keep in mind that not everyone may have the same strength of personality that you do.
perhaps your partner comes from a traditional culture where same sex relationships are not only looked down upon but could even mean a threat to his/her safety.
let your partner express his/her fears and anxieties about coming out of the closet; at the same time, let him/her know what your expectations are from a relationship, what you need a relationship to have if it’s to be meaningful to you.