Rules for dating chinese girls
'The Chinese family is getting smaller and smaller and so the pressure on young women today is huge,’ says the social historian Simon Gjeroe.
'There’s a very large older population in China that by sheer weight of numbers is winning the pressure war.
Unfortunately for China’s women their new-found confidence has incited a backlash from men, the government and even their own families.
The popular Chinese label (leftover women), regularly perpetuated in state-controlled media and on internet message boards, refers to women who are smart, successful and moneyed but still not married by the age of 28.
But I know they’re just worried,’ she says, hinting at the other big issue at play.
'Because I’m an only child it’s harder, as they are relying a lot on me.’ Women born under China’s one-child policy, introduced in 1979, face enormous pressures to succeed academically from parents whose own aspirations were thwarted under the Mao regime.
That’s right: in China, if you're 30, female and single, you’re considered well and truly on the shelf.
'I always dread Chinese New Year,’ says Yang Ziyang, a 32-year-old talent agent earning in excess of one million RMB (£100,000) a year, 'because that’s when my extended family come over to the house and they all want to know why I’m not married yet.
There are currently 118 men to every 100 women in China – that’s an excess of more than 30 million.Her research suggests that it’s the constant pestering from families that is causing successful women in their late twenties to make major sacrifices.'At that point in their lives a lot of women who are highly educated, attractive and successful will start to really worry about getting married.I’ve met women who actually quit their jobs because they thought they’d find it easier to attract a husband, which is very frightening. There are many countries where men don’t like strong women,’ she points out, 'but Chinese men particularly so.Those who didn’t give up work entirely were turning down promotions.’ The author and social commentator Zhang Lijia knows exactly what she thinks about the term . If a Chinese man is successful he will be looking for a woman who is young and beautiful, not someone who is well educated.’ She pauses before laughing heartily.
I told her that I wasn’t going to rush into marrying just anyone, that my happiness doesn’t only come from my relationships but from my work.